oh, for a whiff of fresh air
I just returned from the drug store, where apparently a bottle of generic brand acetaminophen, one tube of toothpaste and saline nasal spray costs close to $18.
I got the nasal spray for my poor, poor nose, the inside of which has felt like Death Valley for the past week. My glands are also slightly swollen, which led me to the suspicion I was coming down with my first cold of the season. It seemed the most plausible situation, considering I have no defenses against Ontario germs and my daily transit to work requires me riding the subway and bus (aka the cattlecars) for 35 minutes or so each way. So I started drinking lots of juice and taking those huge multivitamins (with minerals!) my mother so kindly sent me. However, I’ve since realized that my issues aren’t with germs but with the dirty Toronto air and the dry electric heat of my apartment. I knew living away from the ocean would take some adjustment but I never thought it would be this bad.
It’s almost as if, after a month living here, my body has realized that we’re not going back to Halifax and has begun a general strike in protest. It’s like that scene in Everything You’ve Ever Wanted To Know About Sex *But Were Afraid To Ask with Tony Randall and Burt Reynolds working Brain Control. "She can’t be serious about actually living in this smoghole, can she?" cries my poor overworked Brain Operator (who I actually picture as Jack Lemmon). "Disengage mucous-producing membranes immediately!"
Damn you to hell, Brain! *shakes fist* I’ll never give in to your pinko commie demands, do you hear me? NEVER!!


